Beyonce fell and we all still love her!
So I know I haven't wrote (or written?) anything in forever but I'm trying to graduate and these papers don't write themselves! Anyway I just wrote some ish on twitter that sounded real good. Why do I always write the best stuff when I am supposed to be writing papers? Any way doh *Kat Sacks Voice* here it goes!
Life is a slippery slope, it only takes one misstep, one little trip on a pebble and you are no longer climbing up but rapidly sliding down. But maybe what is at the top is an illusion, maybe the oasis is really at the bottom. I'm hoping that this misstep is leading me to my oasis and not to the bitter cold that is the night desert.
..and then my friend told me that I sound real depressed lol but I assure you my words are more emo than I really am and I often go into short phases of dramaticalness (yes its a word) that I quickly hop out of, sometimes with assistance.
But honestly sometimes I feel like I am working so hard to better myself to be strong and independent and to establish my self worth and all that jazz, but what if all this work that I'm putting in is only leading me to false happiness, what if what I really need to do is just let go of all the bullshit, lay it all out on the table, and reveal my weaknesses. Its something that I have always struggled with because it is difficult for me to let my guard completely down and it has been increasingly difficult with age. But I think being an adult means that you are able to show your faults and your weaknesses, to trip and fall down the mountain and be okay with it. Maybe thats when you find your true happiness, perhaps the joy is not at the top but it was waiting for you at the bottom all along.
And while I can say this here it is something that I am still struggling with, but I don't have time to deal with it today because I have to write a paper so I can graduate! (20days and counting!). However, I hope that one day soon I can embrace the fall and find my true joy...come fall with me :)
